Hmm, I think about this in my Japanese class and thus I can’t concentrate on my Japanese 2 which has the highest cost-effect value and easiest atmosphere. I think about the good times we had and the good part of his personality. I miss the times we had because it’s so natural and honest. We were like meant for each other except for those problems that can’t be easily solved.
Because of those difficult problems, I feel like I can’t determine myself to spend the rest time of my life with him. If I have this kind of thoughts, my sense of loyalty and moral will judge me to death. I will feel guilty and sorry when I spend times with him. I don’t want him to waste his time on who is not determined. He is a nice guy, and he will have a good life. If we were not going to solve the problem completely, then we have to face the problems some day in the future. If we are meant to break up someday, then I don’t think we should hold this truth and stay together for just happiness. If we don’t have future, I can hardly be happy because I am too honest to both him or myself.
After this cherishing relationship, my kind of first love, should I find somebody who won’t have unsolvable problems when becoming couple with me? But how can I know? Love is the most powerful thing and most amazing thing that should be cherished. Is it better to drop somebody we love because of the problems that you haven’t face? Or should we just try it, follow our heart? It will be a memorable pity for every relationship that ends with mutual love, maybe even worse than people who love each other but never become a couple.
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